Obituary for Maryellen Bocaccino
Maryellen was born and grew up in Milford, MA, a small town of immigrant families from Ireland, Italy and Portugal, the kind of town where our first school was actually a two-room wooden schoolhouse. We lived in a small house, in which my father was born, with Grammy Bocaccino. Maryellen was the older, devoted daughter and the quiet one (also said in comparison to me.) She was an exceptional student, especially in math. Some of my earliest memories are working with Grammy Bocaccino in the “family business” selling seedlings begun in the claw-footed bathtub in the downstairs bathroom in late winter and sold from early spring to midsummer out of two greenhouses in our yard. Maryellen, already a math whiz, counted money and made change; I, four years younger, carried boxes of plants to customer’s cars.
She was elected to the National Honor Society, was a National Merit Semi-finalist, and class salutatorian. She earned a scholarship to Clark University, becoming the first family member to go away to a four-year college. Continuing to excel, she graduated a semester early with a major in Math and, even more impressive, she formed phenomenal friendships that lasted for 50 years.
In 1972, she went off from Worcester to Connecticut and began her career at Travelers Insurance. At the same time, she joined the “The Church of the Incarnation” in Wethersfield, subsequently buying her home down the street from the Church. She volunteered in many ways at the Church. Incarnation is where she found a community of faith that celebrated with her in good times and sustained her through difficult times.
Maryellen was always the bridesmaid, for me and other friends, but never the bride. She made wedding samplers with tiny, tiny stitching. She loved little children, and always seemed to be making a baby blanket for a friend or coworker. She also loved to buy toys from her favorite local toy store for her favorite little children. Until almost the end she delighted in watching children playing in a local park.
There were many good years but some tough years, especially the two times she had prolonged periods of unemployment. The Travelers lay-off led to Barclays, then Fleet Capital. Maryellen ultimately finished work with 10 years in the State of Connecticut’s Medicaid office. In each job, she worked hard and persevered.
The high point of each year was her annual Christmas party with her Clark friends who helped her decorate her home on Olney Road with her large collection of nativities. She loved to cook and prided herself on setting a beautiful table with fine food. We have spent several weekends cataloging Maryellen’s nativities - the grand total was over 90. I remain forever grateful for “the Clarkies” who pitched in to give her one last Christmas party at her house when she was unable to give it herself in 2019.
The big sister, who spent summer hours in the apple tree reading, continued to love reading and left a house was overflowing with books and exquisite needlecraft and a life full of friends.
Her dementia was relentless, but I believe she always had her faith even as her mind progressively failed her. When she was moved into the Memory Care unit at an Assisted Living facility, she found, buried in a dresser drawer, the cross the she had been given when she was installed as an extraordinary minister of the Eucharist and wore frequently, saying it was “special.” When she was no longer dressing herself, a staff member hung it on her bedpost. When she died, it hung over her bed.
Maryellen will be last to carry the Bocaccino name, at least the way we spelled it, since somewhere between Italy and Massachusetts there was some confusion over how many “C”s there were (3 or 4) and the location of the pair of C’s.
She is survived by her sister Carol and her husband, Robert, two nieces Bridget Cherry and Erin Kelly, and her nephew Brendan Kelly and their families. She was also blessed to have so many other wonderful people in her life- friends, co-workers, and neighbors.
Carol Bocaccino Kelly
If you are able to join us for the wake or funeral, please wear a mask for the safety of older or immunocompromised adults who may be susceptible to COVID, even if vaccinated, and to protect children too young for the vaccine.
In lieu of flowers, please consider making a donation to the Church of Incarnation, Wethersfield, or if you prefer, a donation to your favorite charity in Maryellen’s name.
She was elected to the National Honor Society, was a National Merit Semi-finalist, and class salutatorian. She earned a scholarship to Clark University, becoming the first family member to go away to a four-year college. Continuing to excel, she graduated a semester early with a major in Math and, even more impressive, she formed phenomenal friendships that lasted for 50 years.
In 1972, she went off from Worcester to Connecticut and began her career at Travelers Insurance. At the same time, she joined the “The Church of the Incarnation” in Wethersfield, subsequently buying her home down the street from the Church. She volunteered in many ways at the Church. Incarnation is where she found a community of faith that celebrated with her in good times and sustained her through difficult times.
Maryellen was always the bridesmaid, for me and other friends, but never the bride. She made wedding samplers with tiny, tiny stitching. She loved little children, and always seemed to be making a baby blanket for a friend or coworker. She also loved to buy toys from her favorite local toy store for her favorite little children. Until almost the end she delighted in watching children playing in a local park.
There were many good years but some tough years, especially the two times she had prolonged periods of unemployment. The Travelers lay-off led to Barclays, then Fleet Capital. Maryellen ultimately finished work with 10 years in the State of Connecticut’s Medicaid office. In each job, she worked hard and persevered.
The high point of each year was her annual Christmas party with her Clark friends who helped her decorate her home on Olney Road with her large collection of nativities. She loved to cook and prided herself on setting a beautiful table with fine food. We have spent several weekends cataloging Maryellen’s nativities - the grand total was over 90. I remain forever grateful for “the Clarkies” who pitched in to give her one last Christmas party at her house when she was unable to give it herself in 2019.
The big sister, who spent summer hours in the apple tree reading, continued to love reading and left a house was overflowing with books and exquisite needlecraft and a life full of friends.
Her dementia was relentless, but I believe she always had her faith even as her mind progressively failed her. When she was moved into the Memory Care unit at an Assisted Living facility, she found, buried in a dresser drawer, the cross the she had been given when she was installed as an extraordinary minister of the Eucharist and wore frequently, saying it was “special.” When she was no longer dressing herself, a staff member hung it on her bedpost. When she died, it hung over her bed.
Maryellen will be last to carry the Bocaccino name, at least the way we spelled it, since somewhere between Italy and Massachusetts there was some confusion over how many “C”s there were (3 or 4) and the location of the pair of C’s.
She is survived by her sister Carol and her husband, Robert, two nieces Bridget Cherry and Erin Kelly, and her nephew Brendan Kelly and their families. She was also blessed to have so many other wonderful people in her life- friends, co-workers, and neighbors.
Carol Bocaccino Kelly
If you are able to join us for the wake or funeral, please wear a mask for the safety of older or immunocompromised adults who may be susceptible to COVID, even if vaccinated, and to protect children too young for the vaccine.
In lieu of flowers, please consider making a donation to the Church of Incarnation, Wethersfield, or if you prefer, a donation to your favorite charity in Maryellen’s name.