Obituary for John Francis "Jack" Farrelly
John Francis Farrelly, also known as “Jack,” devoted husband to Sharon (Smith), loving father to Christine (Laura Torres) and Eileen (Manoj Doshi), and proud, doting grandfather to Lynette, Luz, and Diego Torres, and, Megan and Jack Doshi, died on September 18, 2022, holding Sharon’s hand and surrounded by his family.
Whether he was John, Dad, Grandpa, Jack, Jackie, or Uncle Jack, there would never be enough space or words to tell all the stories, share all the memories, and describe the impact he had on so many lives. John lived a good life that is impossible to summarize with dignity in a few paragraphs. He was one of a kind and the best of the best as a husband, father, and grandfather, and even though he did more than that, nothing else mattered to him.
John was the son of Frank and Elizabeth (Mulryan) Farrelly, born on August 25, 1944, in Massachusetts. He grew up in the South End of Hartford in a 3-family house with his grandmother, aunts, uncles, and cousins (Johnson and Mulryan families), and siblings Francis (“Bud” and Delphine), Kathleen (“Kay” and Joe Tapper), and Brian, whom he leaves behind. He was also a favorite uncle to the “Tapper boys” – Danny, Jon, and Jeff, and to Sean and Meeghan (Stilson) Farrelly.
John had so many memories from his childhood and spoke of taking care of his grandmother, his blue bicycle, jumping from the third-floor apartment into snow banks, making his parent’s bed, picking up his sister from college, his Aunt Peg giving him $10 before he left for the Navy, buying cars for his father and himself, his favorite being a 1962 Oldsmobile 98, listening to the radio, his favorite song being “In the Still of the Night”, how much he loved his father, and growing up with his cousins.
John said he started lifting weights when he was fifteen because he viewed himself as a scrawny kid. He graduated from Buckley High School in 1963 and graduated from Prince Tech Trade School in 1965, where he met Sharon, the love of his life and his wife of 54 years. John served in the U.S. Navy Reserve as a Damage Controlman, Third Class Petty Officer and traveled to the Mediterranean and throughout the Caribbean.
John became a carpenter and was in Local Union 43. As a skilled construction carpenter, John worked on most buildings in downtown Hartford and beyond. John leaves behind a legacy in the Hartford skyline, including the Gold Building, Commercial Plaza, the original Civic Center, the Convention Center, the Learning Corridor, CCMC, Seabury in Bloomfield, Rentschler Field, and the Science Center, to name a few. Next time you drive by or drive through Hartford when you look up, know that John built all of that and when you watch a UCONN game, know that he built that too!
John said that Sharon “tamed him,” and they were a team and always together. John was very proud of his marriage and the family they raised together. He liked nothing more than spending time at home holding hands with his wife and enjoying activities with his children and grandchildren.
John and Sharon were married in 1968 and bought their family home in Wethersfield in 1971. Over the years, John built decks, installed an above-ground pool, and engaged in many home improvements, including landscaping projects. Their plush yard contains seedlings and stones collected from travels with his wife. He was affectionately referred to as “Mr. P” by his family because everything, no matter how big or small, was a “project.” John’s skills transferred into Christine’s hobbies; he would never let her use a Skilsaw, but together they built a fireplace mantel, tables, walls, and shelves, and he walked her through and encouraged every other project from a distance, like re-siding a house!
John was a very active, involved father with his daughters, who served as their softball coach, teacher of real-life skills, and their biggest fan. He constantly told his girls that they were beautiful and that he was so proud of them. John taught his daughters they could do anything anyone else could do - how to paint, swim, bike ride, use tools, change a tire and build furniture. One “Jack-ism” was “your feet don’t have eyes.” John always helped his daughters by offering opinions, explanations, and life lessons, which continued when they were adults. He was not only their father but their life coach and brutally honest, sometimes critical, best friend. No matter what he said, his girls liked him back and will miss him every day.
John’s grandchildren were the impetus for retirement and became the center of his existence. As a grandfather, John was present, playful, engaged, and their loudest cheerleader. He loved being a chauffeur, math teacher, grilled-cheese maker, and active audience member for every recital, practice, cross-country track meet, award ceremony, or other events. He played with them even when it wasn’t appropriate and sometimes introduced some questionable mischief. He was famous for overindulging them in everything from silly shenanigans to food to gifts. John loved taking them to the park when they were little and stayed and played for hours, most often exhausting him and the kids. With Lynette, Luz, and Diego, John celebrated Friday nights with pizza, dance parties, and karaoke. This past year, he filled his weekends eating Chinese take-out and teaching Jack to drive his precious Chevy Tahoe. His “little angel,” Megan, filled his heart with special joy and pride with her kindness and compassion. He recognized each grandchild for their strengths and individuality and felt that whatever they did was a great accomplishment, and he radiated with pride when he talked about them. His wardrobe was full of “World’s Greatest Grandpa” t-shirts, which he proudly wore every single day for years.
John was content with the simplicity of things. Travel was not something John looked forward to, but he did it anyway. He tried not to leave town often, but when he did, he enjoyed it. He loved his family trips to Disney and Canada, with travels to DC, Baltimore, San Diego, and Vegas.
John’s backyard was his favorite place to spend time as it was a peaceful reminder of teaching his girls to ride bicycles, pushing the tire swing, the game of baseball, playing catch, swimming, playing with his grandchildren, and getting them to sleep in the idyllic breeze. Summer was his favorite season and he always enjoyed an outside nap. John spoiled his dogs over the years – Muffin, Jake, Rudy, Lucky, Boo, and Buddy, who was his constant companion for the last five years, inside and outside.
John completely ignored technology and remained old school with no cell phone, no IPAD, no computer, and no email. He only paid cash and did not have a credit card. John said people had to talk to him because he didn’t have a cell phone. During Covid, on FaceTime, he loved seeing his family, but it took weeks for him to realize that his family could also see him! The only technology he embraced was a remote control which he could handle as long as the input wasn’t changed.
For his 78 years, he was a muscled, very strong, semi-long-haired guy. Over the past few years, he lost a little muscle, but he always bragged that he maintained a full head of good hair. John loved food and loved to eat. Sharon is an excellent cook and loved to feed him. John loved the Yankees, Genoa salami grinders, mashed potatoes, talking about politics and the news, cable tv, binge-watching series, Judge Judy, and Bud Ice at his perfect temperature of 28 degrees. He easily talked to anyone always finding a common denominator.
John was a self-effacing, private, simple guy, but did a lot of thinking and had philosophical thoughts about life. John was practical, stubborn, and blunt, and boy could he hold a grudge. He was very obstinate and always refused help. Conversely, John was a giver, generous to a fault, always wanting to do things for others, and never thought of himself.
As he rested this past week, he told his wife he wanted to kidnap or handcuff her to him. John wanted her to sit with him and said, “I just want to look at you.” John remained superhero-strong until the very end. John said, “We have a good family and made a good life.” Family was everything to him, and he said he was “heartbroken” to have to leave us, and we are heartbroken too.
In lieu of flowers, memorial donations may be made in John’s memory to the Wethersfield High School Boys’ Cross Country Booster Club, 411 Wolcott Hill Road, Wethersfield, CT 06109. Burial will be private with military honors in the State Veterans Cemetery in Middletown.
Whether he was John, Dad, Grandpa, Jack, Jackie, or Uncle Jack, there would never be enough space or words to tell all the stories, share all the memories, and describe the impact he had on so many lives. John lived a good life that is impossible to summarize with dignity in a few paragraphs. He was one of a kind and the best of the best as a husband, father, and grandfather, and even though he did more than that, nothing else mattered to him.
John was the son of Frank and Elizabeth (Mulryan) Farrelly, born on August 25, 1944, in Massachusetts. He grew up in the South End of Hartford in a 3-family house with his grandmother, aunts, uncles, and cousins (Johnson and Mulryan families), and siblings Francis (“Bud” and Delphine), Kathleen (“Kay” and Joe Tapper), and Brian, whom he leaves behind. He was also a favorite uncle to the “Tapper boys” – Danny, Jon, and Jeff, and to Sean and Meeghan (Stilson) Farrelly.
John had so many memories from his childhood and spoke of taking care of his grandmother, his blue bicycle, jumping from the third-floor apartment into snow banks, making his parent’s bed, picking up his sister from college, his Aunt Peg giving him $10 before he left for the Navy, buying cars for his father and himself, his favorite being a 1962 Oldsmobile 98, listening to the radio, his favorite song being “In the Still of the Night”, how much he loved his father, and growing up with his cousins.
John said he started lifting weights when he was fifteen because he viewed himself as a scrawny kid. He graduated from Buckley High School in 1963 and graduated from Prince Tech Trade School in 1965, where he met Sharon, the love of his life and his wife of 54 years. John served in the U.S. Navy Reserve as a Damage Controlman, Third Class Petty Officer and traveled to the Mediterranean and throughout the Caribbean.
John became a carpenter and was in Local Union 43. As a skilled construction carpenter, John worked on most buildings in downtown Hartford and beyond. John leaves behind a legacy in the Hartford skyline, including the Gold Building, Commercial Plaza, the original Civic Center, the Convention Center, the Learning Corridor, CCMC, Seabury in Bloomfield, Rentschler Field, and the Science Center, to name a few. Next time you drive by or drive through Hartford when you look up, know that John built all of that and when you watch a UCONN game, know that he built that too!
John said that Sharon “tamed him,” and they were a team and always together. John was very proud of his marriage and the family they raised together. He liked nothing more than spending time at home holding hands with his wife and enjoying activities with his children and grandchildren.
John and Sharon were married in 1968 and bought their family home in Wethersfield in 1971. Over the years, John built decks, installed an above-ground pool, and engaged in many home improvements, including landscaping projects. Their plush yard contains seedlings and stones collected from travels with his wife. He was affectionately referred to as “Mr. P” by his family because everything, no matter how big or small, was a “project.” John’s skills transferred into Christine’s hobbies; he would never let her use a Skilsaw, but together they built a fireplace mantel, tables, walls, and shelves, and he walked her through and encouraged every other project from a distance, like re-siding a house!
John was a very active, involved father with his daughters, who served as their softball coach, teacher of real-life skills, and their biggest fan. He constantly told his girls that they were beautiful and that he was so proud of them. John taught his daughters they could do anything anyone else could do - how to paint, swim, bike ride, use tools, change a tire and build furniture. One “Jack-ism” was “your feet don’t have eyes.” John always helped his daughters by offering opinions, explanations, and life lessons, which continued when they were adults. He was not only their father but their life coach and brutally honest, sometimes critical, best friend. No matter what he said, his girls liked him back and will miss him every day.
John’s grandchildren were the impetus for retirement and became the center of his existence. As a grandfather, John was present, playful, engaged, and their loudest cheerleader. He loved being a chauffeur, math teacher, grilled-cheese maker, and active audience member for every recital, practice, cross-country track meet, award ceremony, or other events. He played with them even when it wasn’t appropriate and sometimes introduced some questionable mischief. He was famous for overindulging them in everything from silly shenanigans to food to gifts. John loved taking them to the park when they were little and stayed and played for hours, most often exhausting him and the kids. With Lynette, Luz, and Diego, John celebrated Friday nights with pizza, dance parties, and karaoke. This past year, he filled his weekends eating Chinese take-out and teaching Jack to drive his precious Chevy Tahoe. His “little angel,” Megan, filled his heart with special joy and pride with her kindness and compassion. He recognized each grandchild for their strengths and individuality and felt that whatever they did was a great accomplishment, and he radiated with pride when he talked about them. His wardrobe was full of “World’s Greatest Grandpa” t-shirts, which he proudly wore every single day for years.
John was content with the simplicity of things. Travel was not something John looked forward to, but he did it anyway. He tried not to leave town often, but when he did, he enjoyed it. He loved his family trips to Disney and Canada, with travels to DC, Baltimore, San Diego, and Vegas.
John’s backyard was his favorite place to spend time as it was a peaceful reminder of teaching his girls to ride bicycles, pushing the tire swing, the game of baseball, playing catch, swimming, playing with his grandchildren, and getting them to sleep in the idyllic breeze. Summer was his favorite season and he always enjoyed an outside nap. John spoiled his dogs over the years – Muffin, Jake, Rudy, Lucky, Boo, and Buddy, who was his constant companion for the last five years, inside and outside.
John completely ignored technology and remained old school with no cell phone, no IPAD, no computer, and no email. He only paid cash and did not have a credit card. John said people had to talk to him because he didn’t have a cell phone. During Covid, on FaceTime, he loved seeing his family, but it took weeks for him to realize that his family could also see him! The only technology he embraced was a remote control which he could handle as long as the input wasn’t changed.
For his 78 years, he was a muscled, very strong, semi-long-haired guy. Over the past few years, he lost a little muscle, but he always bragged that he maintained a full head of good hair. John loved food and loved to eat. Sharon is an excellent cook and loved to feed him. John loved the Yankees, Genoa salami grinders, mashed potatoes, talking about politics and the news, cable tv, binge-watching series, Judge Judy, and Bud Ice at his perfect temperature of 28 degrees. He easily talked to anyone always finding a common denominator.
John was a self-effacing, private, simple guy, but did a lot of thinking and had philosophical thoughts about life. John was practical, stubborn, and blunt, and boy could he hold a grudge. He was very obstinate and always refused help. Conversely, John was a giver, generous to a fault, always wanting to do things for others, and never thought of himself.
As he rested this past week, he told his wife he wanted to kidnap or handcuff her to him. John wanted her to sit with him and said, “I just want to look at you.” John remained superhero-strong until the very end. John said, “We have a good family and made a good life.” Family was everything to him, and he said he was “heartbroken” to have to leave us, and we are heartbroken too.
In lieu of flowers, memorial donations may be made in John’s memory to the Wethersfield High School Boys’ Cross Country Booster Club, 411 Wolcott Hill Road, Wethersfield, CT 06109. Burial will be private with military honors in the State Veterans Cemetery in Middletown.